Questions · Meeting the family

Questions for meeting your partner’s Filipino family

Meeting the family is a big deal in the Philippines, and the table will be full. These questions are easy, warm and safe to ask titos, titas and lola, in English, with the Tagalog there if you want to try it.

  • 16 questions
  • EN + TL on every card
  • Free in the app
Download on theApp Store Get it onGoogle Play

Kumustahan is a bilingual conversation card app: 1,200 questions in English and Filipino across 7 decks, with a short reflection on the back of every card.

Getting to know№ 04

When you try a place to eat, what makes it feel worth visiting again?

Kapag may tinry kang kainan, ano yung nagpapaisip sa'yo na worth balikan ito?

Tap to flipkumustahan
A note

It could be taste, comfort, price, people, or memory. Places become favorites for different reasons.

Puwedeng lasa, comfort, presyo, tao, o memory. Iba-iba yung dahilan kung bakit may places tayong binabalikan.

Tap to returnkumustahan

The questions

16 questions to ask a Filipino family

Every question in English and Filipino/Tagalog, word for word from the Kumustahan decks. Open “Back of the card” for the reflection printed on the other side.

While everyone is eating

6 questions

Food is the safest start, and you will be offered a lot of it.

  1. Pick one snack you would still accept even when you're already full.

    Pick one snack na tatanggapin mo pa rin kahit busog ka na.

    Back of the card

    Some cravings stay charmingly powerful. The snack you still make room for usually knows exactly how to find your soft spot.

    May cravings talaga na malakas pa rin kahit busog. Yung snack na yan, alam kung saan ka mahina.

  2. Choose one food that tastes better when it’s left over for the next day.

    Pumili ng isang pagkain na mas masarap kapag tira siya hanggang kinabukasan.

    Back of the card

    Some food needs an overnight plot twist. Leftovers can be humble, practical, and somehow better than round one.

    May pagkain talaga na mas gumaganda kinabukasan. Simple lang siya, practical, pero minsan mas panalo pa.

  3. Tell us a food combo you like that people might question.

    I-share yung food combo na gusto mo pero baka kuwestiyunin ng iba.

    Back of the card

    Questionable does not always mean wrong. Some pairings just need one brave person to admit they work.

    Hindi porket questionable, mali na agad. Minsan kailangan lang ng isang brave person na umaming masarap siya.

  4. If someone were choosing a snack or drink for you, what’s one choice that would almost always work?

    Kung may pipili ng snack o drink para sa'yo, ano yung halos laging okay sa'yo?

    Back of the card

    Tiny preferences can be an easy way to know someone better. It feels good when people remember the simple things.

    Minsan sa small preferences tayo mas nakikilala. Nakakatuwa rin kapag may nakakaalala ng simple things about you.

  5. If you were too tired to think, what would you order?

    Kapag pagod ka nang mag-isip, ano yung o-orderin mo?

    Back of the card

    The no-thinking order is its own kind of comfort. It is the choice that carries you when your brain is done.

    May comfort din sa order na hindi mo na kailangang isipin. Siya yung choice kapag ubos na utak mo.

  6. When your brain is tired, what is your go-to order?

    Kapag pagod na utak mo, ano yung go-to order mo?

    Back of the card

    The reliable order deserves respect. It shows up when decisions are too much and hunger is already making a case.

    Respect sa reliable order. Lumalabas siya kapag ayaw mo nang mag-decide at gutom na rin ang nagsasalita.

About home

5 questions

Habits and places everyone has an opinion on.

  1. Name one pambahay item you always reach for, like a shirt, shorts, slippers, blanket, or mug.

    Magbanggit ng isang pambahay item na lagi mong ginagamit, like shirt, shorts, tsinelas, kumot, o mug.

    Back of the card

    The best pambahay items are not trying to impress anyone. They just show up, stay comfortable, and do their job.

    Yung best pambahay items, hindi kailangan magpa-impress. Comfortable lang, reliable, at laging ready sa bahay.

  2. Before leaving the house, what do you always check?

    Bago umalis ng bahay, ano yung lagi mong chine-check?

    Back of the card

    Small checks are tiny protection from future hassle. Everyone has one thing they refuse to leave up to memory.

    Maliit lang yung check, pero nakakaiwas sa future hassle. Lahat tayo may isang bagay na hindi pwedeng memory lang.

  3. While waiting for food, a ride, or someone late, how do you pass the time?

    Habang naghihintay ng pagkain, sasakyan, o late na tao, paano mo pinapalipas yung oras?

    Back of the card

    Waiting brings out our tiny survival styles. Some people scroll, some observe, and some start making stories in their head.

    Lumilitaw yung tiny survival style natin kapag naghihintay. May nag-scroll, may nag-oobserve, may gumagawa na ng kwento sa isip.

  4. With an unlimited budget, what extra room would you add to your home?

    Kung walang limit ang budget, anong dagdag na kuwarto ang gusto mo sa bahay?

    Back of the card

    If the new room had a sign on its door, what would it say?

    Kung may karatula sa pinto ng bagong kuwarto, ano ang nakasulat doon?

  5. When you try a place to eat, what makes it feel worth visiting again?

    Kapag may tinry kang kainan, ano yung nagpapaisip sa'yo na worth balikan ito?

    Back of the card

    It could be taste, comfort, price, people, or memory. Places become favorites for different reasons.

    Puwedeng lasa, comfort, presyo, tao, o memory. Iba-iba yung dahilan kung bakit may places tayong binabalikan.

For the stories

5 questions

Once people are relaxed, ask for one.

  1. When you were younger, what got you excited quickly?

    Nung bata ka, ano yung madaling maka-excite sa'yo?

    Back of the card

    Early excitement can be fun to remember. It can also show what kind of wonder came naturally to you.

    Nakakatuwang balikan yung madaling ika-excite mo dati. Minsan pinapakita rin nito kung anong klaseng wonder ang natural sa'yo.

  2. Create a new holiday that everyone gets to celebrate. What happens that day?

    Gumawa ng bagong holiday na puwedeng i-celebrate ng lahat. Ano ang ginagawa sa araw na iyon?

    Back of the card

    What tradition would belong to your holiday?

    Anong tradisyon ang bagay sa holiday mo?

  3. Name one harmless opinion you take seriously, like food, movies, habits, or small preferences.

    Magbanggit ng isang harmless opinion na seryoso ka, like food, movies, habits, o small preferences.

    Back of the card

    Harmless opinions are a safe place to be dramatic. The stakes are low, but the conviction can still be strong.

    Safe maging dramatic sa harmless opinions. Low stakes lang, pero pwedeng strong pa rin ang conviction.

  4. For a good hangout, what matters most: tasty food, a comfy place, or good conversation?

    Sa bonding, ano ang pinakamahalaga: masarap na pagkain, komportableng lugar, o masayang kuwentuhan?

    Back of the card

    Imagine a hangout with your top choice and nothing fancy. Where would it happen?

    Isipin ang simpleng bonding na mayroon ng pinili mo. Saan ito mangyayari?

  5. Describe your favorite quiet moment at home in one sentence.

    I-describe in one sentence yung favorite mong tahimik na moment sa bahay.

    Back of the card

    Quiet at home can be its own kind of treat. Sometimes the best part is that nothing needs to happen.

    Yung tahimik sa bahay, treat din minsan. Minsan best part na yung walang kailangang mangyari.

How to use them

Before you ask

A Filipino family gathering is loud, crowded and full of food. Expect to be offered seconds and thirds, to be asked how you met, and to meet more cousins than you can name. The good news: Filipino families love a guest who asks questions and listens to the stories.

Start with food. Ask about the dishes on the table and which one is someone’s specialty. Then ask small questions about home and habits, and let the titos and titas do what they love: tell stories. Save anything heavy for later visits.

A few words of Tagalog go a long way. Try “Kumusta po kayo?” (How are you?, polite) and “Salamat po” (Thank you, polite). The po shows respect to elders.

Good for

  • Meeting your partner’s parents
  • Your first Filipino Christmas or fiesta
  • Video calls with family in the Philippines
  • Weddings, debuts and birthdays

Tips

  1. Greet the elders first. Your partner can show you the mano, a gesture of respect.
  2. Accept food. Say yes to a little of everything.
  3. Ask about dishes, places and old stories, not money, politics or when you’re getting married.
  4. Let your partner translate when needed; ask them to teach you one phrase per visit.

Decks for this

Meeting a Filipino family

Frequently asked questions

What should I ask when meeting a Filipino family?

Ask about the food on the table, family traditions and old stories, especially from the elders. Small, friendly questions about home and habits are safer than personal ones on a first visit.

What should I say when meeting Filipino parents?

A polite “Kumusta po kayo?” (How are you?) and “Salamat po” (Thank you) are warmly received. Use “po” with elders as a sign of respect.

What topics should I avoid with a Filipino family?

On a first visit, skip money, politics, religion debates and questions about weight or marriage plans. Food, places and family stories are always welcome.

Bring a better question to the table.

Free on iPhone and Android. 420 cards free, no account, works offline.

Download on theApp Store Get it onGoogle Play