Questions · Mentee
Questions to ask your mentee so you’re not just giving advice
Questions for mentors: learn how your mentee works, let them name where they want to grow, talk through the hard weeks, and help them notice their own progress.
- 19 questions
- EN + TL on every card
- Free in the app
Kumustahan is a bilingual conversation card app: 1,200 questions in English and Filipino across 7 decks, with a short reflection on the back of every card.
Pick one habit you want to adjust in a small, realistic way.
Pumili ng isang habit na gusto mong i-adjust sa maliit at realistic na way.
Change does not have to be dramatic. One small adjustment can make tomorrow a little kinder.
Hindi kailangang dramatic ang change. Puwedeng isang maliit na adjustment lang para mas kinder ang bukas.
The questions
19 questions to ask your mentee
Every question in English and Filipino/Tagalog, word for word from the Kumustahan decks. Open “Back of the card” for the reflection printed on the other side.
First meeting: how they work
5 questions
Learn their style before you recommend yours.
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Which kind of task makes you lose track of time?
Anong klaseng task yung nakakalimutan mong oras kapag ginagawa mo?
Back of the card
The tasks that make time move fast can reveal what absorbs you, energizes you, or quietly fits how your mind works.
Yung tasks na nagpapabilis ng oras pwedeng clue kung ano ang kumukuha ng focus mo, nagpapagana sa'yo, o bagay sa utak mo.
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If someone worked or studied with you for one week, what would they notice about your style?
Kung may makakasama ka sa work o school for one week, ano kaya ang mapapansin nila sa style mo?
Back of the card
Your style may show in pace, focus, questions, breaks, or how you handle pressure. People notice more than we think.
Pwedeng lumabas ang style mo sa pace, focus, tanong, breaks, o paano ka humarap sa pressure. Marami palang napapansin ang tao.
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In a group, which role feels most natural to you: listener, storyteller, organizer, or side-comment person?
Sa group, anong role yung natural sa'yo: listener, taga-kuwento, organizer, o taga-side comment?
Back of the card
Group roles can shift, but most of us have a default. It is one way people learn how to read us.
Nagbabago minsan ang role sa group, pero madalas may default tayo. Doon din tayo minsan nababasa ng mga tao.
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In an adventure story, would you be the guide, cook, builder, storyteller, or someone else?
Sa adventure story, anong role ang pipiliin mo: guide, cook, builder, storyteller, o iba pa?
Back of the card
Your character has one familiar object in their bag. What is it?
May isang pamilyar na gamit sa bag ng tauhan mo. Ano iyon?
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Give yourself a funny award for something you are surprisingly good at.
Bigyan mo sarili mo ng funny award para sa bagay na surprisingly magaling ka.
Back of the card
A funny award makes small talents official. Some skills may not belong on a resume, but they still deserve a ceremony.
Ginagawang official ng funny award ang small talents. Hindi man pang-resume, deserve pa rin ng ceremony.
Where they want to grow
5 questions
Let them name the direction. Your job is the questions.
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Pick one habit you want to adjust in a small, realistic way.
Pumili ng isang habit na gusto mong i-adjust sa maliit at realistic na way.
Back of the card
Change does not have to be dramatic. One small adjustment can make tomorrow a little kinder.
Hindi kailangang dramatic ang change. Puwedeng isang maliit na adjustment lang para mas kinder ang bukas.
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Describe the kind of person your recent choices point toward.
I-describe kung anong klaseng tao ang tinuturo ng recent choices mo.
Back of the card
Your choices are not the whole story, but they do point somewhere. Notice the direction without rushing to judge it.
Hindi buong story ang choices mo, pero may direction silang tinuturo. Pansinin muna bago husgahan.
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Name something you are outgrowing, even if you still care about it.
Magsabi ng isang bagay na parang ino-outgrow mo na, kahit may care ka pa rin doon.
Back of the card
Outgrowing something does not always mean rejecting it. Sometimes it means honoring what was real while making room to change.
Hindi laging rejection ang pag-outgrow. Minsan pag-honor siya sa naging totoo, habang gumagawa ng space para magbago.
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Recall the last time you tried something new just because you were curious.
Ikuwento ang huling beses na sumubok ka ng bago dahil curious ka lang.
Back of the card
Would you try it again, or was once enough?
Susubukan mo ba ulit, o sapat na ang minsan?
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Which part of your personality has been showing up more lately?
Anong part ng personality mo ang mas lumalabas lately?
Back of the card
The parts showing up may be asking to be noticed, used, or cared for. Curiosity can be a gentle start.
Yung parts na mas lumalabas, baka gusto lang mapansin, magamit, o maalagaan. Puwedeng curiosity muna ang start.
When it gets hard
5 questions
For the meeting after a rough review or a launch that flopped.
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Which fear gets smaller when you talk about it?
Anong takot ang gumagaan kapag naikukwento mo?
Back of the card
Some fears grow in silence and shrink in safe air. Talking can help you see their true size.
May takot na lumalaki kapag tahimik lang. Kapag naikuwento sa safe na lugar, mas nakikita mo ang totoong laki niya.
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Name one mistake you are ready to stop replaying so much.
Magsabi ng isang mistake na ready ka nang hindi paulit-ulit i-replay.
Back of the card
A mistake can teach without taking over the whole story. You can remember the lesson without replaying the hurt.
Puwedeng may tinuro ang mistake nang hindi siya ang buong story. Puwede mong tandaan ang lesson nang hindi inuulit ang sakit.
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Where do you need to be less harsh with yourself?
Saan mo kailangang bawasan ang pagiging harsh sa sarili mo?
Back of the card
Being less harsh does not mean caring less. It can mean choosing a voice that helps you keep moving honestly.
Hindi ibig sabihin na wala kang pakialam kapag hindi ka harsh. Baka mas helpful lang ang boses na hindi ka dinudurog.
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Name one expectation of yourself that feels too heavy lately.
Magsabi ng isang expectation mo sa sarili mo na parang ang bigat lately.
Back of the card
Some expectations sound responsible but leave no room to breathe. You can ask whether they are still fair.
May expectations na responsible pakinggan pero walang space huminga. Puwede mong tanungin kung fair pa ba sila.
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After finishing something hard, how do you usually celebrate or recover?
Kapag natapos mo ang mahirap na bagay, paano ka usually nagse-celebrate o nagre-recover?
Back of the card
Finishing something hard deserves a landing. Some people mark it loudly; some just need a quiet exhale.
Kapag may natapos kang mahirap, kailangan din ng landing. May nagse-celebrate nang malakas; may tahimik na hinga lang.
Wins they might skip over
4 questions
Most mentees undersell their progress. Ask until they say it.
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What have you done recently that you are pleased about?
Anong nagawa mo kamakailan ang ikinatuwa mo?
Back of the card
If your win had a tiny trophy, what would be written on it?
Kung may maliit na trophy ang nagawa mo, ano ang nakasulat dito?
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What do you like more about yourself than you used to?
Ano ang mas nagugustuhan mo sa sarili mo kaysa dati?
Back of the card
Would you appreciate the same thing in another person? Your story can stay private.
Magugustuhan mo rin ba iyon sa ibang tao? Puwedeng itago ang sarili mong kuwento.
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Which small adulting skill are you proud you can do now?
Anong small adulting skill ang proud kang kaya mo na ngayon?
Back of the card
Adulting skills can be funny and real at the same time. Paying, fixing, calling, cooking, asking: they all count.
Nakakatawa pero real ang adulting skills. Magbayad, mag-ayos, tumawag, magluto, magtanong: counted lahat yan.
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Tell us about a small thing you can do now that would have amazed you as a kid.
Kuwento mo yung maliit na bagay na kaya mo na ngayon na maa-amaze ka kung bata ka pa.
Back of the card
Progress can look ordinary from the outside. But younger you might know exactly how big that ordinary thing is.
Mukhang ordinaryo minsan ang progress. Pero baka alam ng batang ikaw kung gaano kalaki yung ordinaryong bagay na yan.
How to use them
Before you ask
Good questions to ask your mentee start with how they already work, not with what you would do in their place. Advice lands better once you know whether they think best against a deadline or on a blank afternoon, whether they lead or support in a group, and which tasks make them lose track of time.
The usual trap for a mentor is answering too fast. A mentee brings a problem, you tell a story about a similar problem from years ago, and the hour is gone. Try asking two questions before offering anything. Often the real issue is a harsh standard they hold themselves to, or a mistake they keep replaying, and that’s more worth your time than the problem itself.
Every few meetings, use the last group. Ask what they handled recently that they’re pleased about, then wait. Mentees rarely volunteer their wins, and hearing themselves say one out loud is half the point.
Good for
Tips
- Ask two questions before you give any advice.
- Let silence sit for a few seconds; the real answer often comes after the polite one.
- Share a mistake of your own when they’re stuck on one of theirs.
- End each meeting by asking what they’ll try before next time, in their words.
- Keep a running list of their wins and read it back at the end of the program.
Decks for this
Mentee
Frequently asked questions
What questions should a mentor ask a mentee?
Start with how they work best and what they enjoy, then ask where they want to grow and which small habit they’d change. When things are hard, ask what they’re replaying and where they could be less harsh on themselves.
What should a mentor talk about in the first meeting?
How your mentee works and what they want from the relationship. Ask which tasks make them lose track of time, which role they play in a group, and one thing they want to get better at this year.
How do I help a mentee who is struggling?
Ask before advising: which fear gets smaller when they talk about it, which expectation feels too heavy, what has helped before. Then share a time you struggled with something similar.
Bring a better question to the table.
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