Tips · Parties
How to use conversation cards at a party where people mingle
Cards are easy at a dinner table. At a standing party with thirty people, a kitchen full of strangers and a playlist going, you need a different plan.
Kumustahan is a bilingual conversation card app: 1,200 questions in English and Filipino across 7 decks, with a short reflection on the back of every card.
Choose a memory power: remember every name or remember every route you have taken.
Pumili ng memory power: tandaan lahat ng pangalan o lahat ng daang nadaanan mo.
Give your memory power a name. It can sound heroic or completely ordinary.
Bigyan ng pangalan ang memory power mo. Puwedeng pang-hero o ordinaryo lang.
In short
The idea
At a mingling party, conversation cards work best as small, optional nudges: one card handed out at the door, a few left on cocktail tables, or a bowl by the drinks. Nobody has to stop the party for a game; the cards just give strangers a first line.
The key is that they’re available, not required. Some guests will love them; some will ignore them; both are fine.
Good for
Tips
- Hand every guest one card with a mission: ask two people.
- Leave a few cards on every table and swap them hourly.
- Put a bowl of questions by the drinks.
- Use only light, quick questions with a crowd.
- Save a proper round for the late couch crowd.
Decks for this
One card at the door
Print a stack of light questions, or write them on index cards. As each guest arrives, hand them one with a simple mission: “Ask this to two people you don’t know.” It gives shy guests a script and an excuse to approach someone, and it means the first ten minutes aren’t spent hovering by the chips.
Use light, quick questions here. Nobody wants to answer something personal holding a drink and a plate.
Cards on the tables
Leave three or four cards face up on each cocktail table, standing table or kitchen counter. People pick them up while they’re waiting for someone or while a conversation dips. Swap them out every hour so regulars find something new.
A small card stand or a folded sign that says “Pick one, ask someone” helps people understand what they’re for.
A question station by the drinks
The drink table is where strangers end up standing next to each other anyway. Put a bowl of question slips there. While someone waits for the punch, they have something to say to the person beside them.
Your job as host
Watch the edges of the room. When you see someone alone, walk over with a card: “I’m supposed to ask someone this. Help me out?” Then introduce them to someone nearby and leave them with the card.
Around the two-hour mark, when a smaller group has settled on the couch, that’s the moment for a proper round: pass a phone or deck and let everyone answer the same question.
What not to do
- Don’t stop the music to make everyone play.
- Don’t use deep or personal questions with a crowd.
- Don’t put cards in the bathroom. (People suggest it. It’s weird.)
- Don’t force the holdouts. A party where some people ignore the cards is still a good party.
The questions
Questions for a mingling crowd
Real cards from the app, quick enough to answer with a drink in one hand.
Hand one out at the door
6 questions
Easy to ask a stranger.
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Choose a memory power: remember every name or remember every route you have taken.
Pumili ng memory power: tandaan lahat ng pangalan o lahat ng daang nadaanan mo.
Back of the card
Give your memory power a name. It can sound heroic or completely ordinary.
Bigyan ng pangalan ang memory power mo. Puwedeng pang-hero o ordinaryo lang.
-
For a good hangout, what matters most: tasty food, a comfy place, or good conversation?
Sa bonding, ano ang pinakamahalaga: masarap na pagkain, komportableng lugar, o masayang kuwentuhan?
Back of the card
Imagine a hangout with your top choice and nothing fancy. Where would it happen?
Isipin ang simpleng bonding na mayroon ng pinili mo. Saan ito mangyayari?
-
If money were no problem, how would you spend a Saturday with nothing you had to do?
Kung walang kailangang gawin at hindi problema ang pera, paano mo gagamitin ang isang Sabado?
Back of the card
Picture the end of your Saturday. What would make you wish it were still morning?
Isipin ang katapusan ng Sabado mo. Bakit mo gugustuhing umaga pa lang?
-
Which language would you learn instantly if you woke up fluent tomorrow?
Kung paggising mo bukas ay marunong ka na ng isang bagong language, ano ang pipiliin mo?
Back of the card
Choose the first person you would like to talk to in that language.
Piliin ang unang taong gusto mong makausap gamit ang wikang iyon.
-
Would you rather have someone cook or clean for you?
Mas gusto mo bang may magluto o maglinis para sa'yo?
Back of the card
Picture doing something you enjoy while they handle the task.
Isipin ang masayang gagawin mo habang sila ang bahala.
-
Name one small, specific thing you enjoy more than people expect.
Magbanggit ng isang maliit at specific na bagay na mas enjoy mo kaysa ina-expect ng iba.
Back of the card
Specific joys can be tiny clues about a person. They do not need to make sense to everyone to be real.
Yung specific joys, maliit na clue tungkol sa tao. Hindi kailangan gets ng lahat para maging real.
Leave on the cocktail tables
5 questions
Small opinions that start small debates.
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Name one harmless opinion you take seriously, like food, movies, habits, or small preferences.
Magbanggit ng isang harmless opinion na seryoso ka, like food, movies, habits, o small preferences.
Back of the card
Harmless opinions are a safe place to be dramatic. The stakes are low, but the conviction can still be strong.
Safe maging dramatic sa harmless opinions. Low stakes lang, pero pwedeng strong pa rin ang conviction.
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Complete the line: I'm chill, but please don't ___.
Kumpletuhin: Chill naman ako, pero please wag ___.
Back of the card
Tiny pet peeves are usually harmless, but they still deserve their moment. Everyone has a small line somewhere.
Harmless lang ang tiny pet peeves, pero deserve din nila ng moment. Lahat tayo may small line somewhere.
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Pick one small mood upgrade, like a drink, song, scent, snack, or clean space.
Pumili ng isang small mood upgrade, like drink, song, scent, snack, o malinis na space.
Back of the card
A mood upgrade does not need to be big. Sometimes one small detail is enough to change the angle of the day.
Hindi kailangang malaki ang mood upgrade. Minsan isang small detail lang, nag-iiba na yung angle ng araw.
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Pick one drink that makes an ordinary day feel a little special.
Pumili ng isang drink na nagpaparamdam na medyo special ang ordinary day.
Back of the card
A drink can turn an ordinary pause into a tiny celebration. Sometimes that small upgrade is the whole point.
Minsan isang drink lang, parang may small celebration na sa ordinary day. Yun na yung tiny upgrade.
-
Pick one snack you would still accept even when you're already full.
Pick one snack na tatanggapin mo pa rin kahit busog ka na.
Back of the card
Some cravings stay charmingly powerful. The snack you still make room for usually knows exactly how to find your soft spot.
May cravings talaga na malakas pa rin kahit busog. Yung snack na yan, alam kung saan ka mahina.
For the couch, late in the party
4 questions
When a smaller group has settled in.
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Plan a hangout that a friend could bring a new friend to.
Kung magsasama ng bagong friend ang kaibigan mo, anong bonding ang ipa-plano mo?
Back of the card
Imagine the newcomer knows none of your old jokes. Your activity can still work.
Isipin na hindi alam ng bagong kasama ang dating mga biro ninyo. Puwede pa ring maging masaya ang activity.
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What simple invitation could brighten a friend's ordinary day?
Anong simpleng yaya ang puwedeng magpasaya sa normal na araw ng friend?
Back of the card
Keep the invitation short enough to send as one message.
Puwedeng maikli lang ang yaya, kasya sa isang message.
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When you meet a new friend or group, how do you usually get comfortable?
Kapag may bago kang friend o group, paano ka usually nagiging comfortable?
Back of the card
People warm up at different speeds. Some start with jokes, some with listening, some by quietly showing up again.
Iba-iba ang pace ng pag-warm up. May dumadaan sa jokes, may sa pakikinig, at may tahimik lang na bumabalik ulit.
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Recall a moment when talking to a new friend started to feel easy.
Kailan ka nagsimulang maging komportable sa pakikipagkuwentuhan sa bago mong friend?
Back of the card
Remember the first thing you no longer felt shy about saying.
Balikan ang unang bagay na hindi ka na nahiyang sabihin.
Conversation cards at a party
Frequently asked questions
How do you use conversation cards at a party?
Hand each guest a card at the door to ask two people, leave a few on each table, and put a bowl by the drinks. Keep them optional and light.
How many conversation cards do I need for a party?
About one per guest for the door, plus three or four per table. Print extras, or use an app for the late-night round.
Are conversation cards good for parties with strangers?
Yes, if the questions are light and quick. They give guests who don’t know anyone an easy first line.
Bring a better question to the table.
Free on iPhone and Android. 420 cards free, no account, works offline.