Questions · Filipino wedding

Questions for a Filipino wedding, for the long reception

Filipino wedding receptions are generous, and long: the entrance of the entourage, the cake, the doves, the money dance, the games, the speeches. In between, tables of relatives and friends who met an hour ago need something to talk about. These questions are for them.

16 questions
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Kumustahan is a bilingual conversation card app: 1,200 questions in English and Filipino across 7 decks, with a short reflection on the back of every card.

Just for fun№ 30

After the main plan ends, which part of the hangout do you enjoy most?

After ng main plan, which part ng hangout ang pinaka-enjoy mo?

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A note

The after-plan part can become the real memory. Looser moments sometimes carry the easiest stories.

Minsan yung after ng main plan ang nagiging totoong memory. Mas loose kasi, kaya mas madaling magka-kwento.

Tap to returnkumustahan

The questions

16 questions for Filipino wedding guests

Every question in English and Filipino/Tagalog, word for word from the Kumustahan decks. Open “Back of the card” for the reflection printed on the other side.

Waiting for the couple’s entrance

4 questions

Easy this-or-that questions while the program runs late.

Would you rather always arrive twenty minutes early or exactly on time?

Mas gusto mo bang laging dumating nang twenty minutes early o laging sakto sa oras?

Back of the card

Finish if you like: "While everyone else is getting ready, I..."
Kung gusto mo, ituloy: "Habang naghahanda pa ang iba, ako..."
For a free weekend, would you prefer a full plan or a surprise?

Sa weekend na wala kang kailangang gawin, kumpletong plano o surprise ang pipiliin mo?

Back of the card

Choose a detail that must stay on your weekend plan, even if everything else is a surprise.
Pumili ng detalye na dapat kasama sa weekend mo kahit surprise ang lahat ng iba pa.
For one month, you can have music or movies, but not both. Which do you keep?

Kung isa lang ang puwede mong ma-enjoy sa loob ng isang buwan, music o movies ang pipiliin mo?

Back of the card

Name the first song or movie you would return to when the month ends.
Anong kanta o movie ang una mong babalikan pagkatapos ng buwan?
When you enter a classroom, meeting room, or café, where do you usually choose to sit?

Pagpasok mo sa classroom, meeting room, o café, saan ka usually pumipili umupo?

Back of the card

Seat choices can reveal comfort, strategy, or pure habit. Somehow we all have a spot our body chooses first.
May sinasabi rin yung seat choice: comfort, strategy, o habit lang talaga. Minsan katawan na ang pumipili.

At the cousins’ table

6 questions

For the table of cousins, barkada and plus-ones.

Group photo starts. What is your automatic move?

May group photo na. Ano ang automatic move mo?

Back of the card

Group photos bring out instant instincts. Some people arrange everyone, some disappear behind others, and some are ready before the camera is.
May automatic instinct kapag group photo na. May taga-ayos, may nagtatago sa likod, may ready bago pa yung camera.
What line do your friends often hear you say?

Anong linya ang madalas marinig ng friends mo sa'yo?

Back of the card

Imagine your usual line printed on a shirt.
Isipin na naka-print sa shirt ang madalas mong sabihin.
After the main plan ends, which part of the hangout do you enjoy most?

After ng main plan, which part ng hangout ang pinaka-enjoy mo?

Back of the card

The after-plan part can become the real memory. Looser moments sometimes carry the easiest stories.
Minsan yung after ng main plan ang nagiging totoong memory. Mas loose kasi, kaya mas madaling magka-kwento.
Rate your normal-day clumsiness from 1 to 5, then share one example.

I-rate from 1 to 5 kung gaano ka ka-clumsy on a normal day, tapos mag-share ng isang example.

Back of the card

Clumsiness has a range, and honesty makes the rating better. One good example can turn any score into evidence.
May range ang clumsiness, at mas funny kapag honest. Isang good example lang, kahit anong score may ebidensya.
Choose your default reaction when something embarrassing happens.

Piliin yung default reaction mo kapag may nakakahiya na nangyari.

Back of the card

Embarrassing moments reveal our automatic settings. Laugh, freeze, explain, escape: every reaction has its own logic.
Lumalabas yung automatic settings natin kapag nakakahiya. Tawa, freeze, explain, takas: may logic lahat yan.
If you and your friends had just one free hour, how would you spend it together?

Kung isang oras lang kayong lahat libre, ano ang gagawin ninyo?

Back of the card

Save a few minutes at the end for one thing you would not want to rush.
Puwede kang maglaan ng ilang minuto sa dulo para sa bagay na ayaw mong madaliin.

For the newlyweds (or the guest book)

6 questions

Ask the couple at their table, or write your answer as a message.

What little thing has gone well for us lately that we should celebrate more?

Anong maliit na bagay ang naging okay sa atin lately na dapat nating i-celebrate pa?

Back of the card

Good moments grow when they are noticed. Celebrating what went well keeps the relationship from feeling like only tasks and problems.
Mas lumalakas yung magagandang moments kapag napapansin. Kapag sine-celebrate natin yung naging okay, hindi puro tasks at problema ang relationship.
What is something I handled well recently that meant more to you than I realized?

Ano yung isang bagay na nahandle ko nang maayos recently na mas malaking bagay pala sa'yo kaysa akala ko?

Back of the card

Specific appreciation helps your partner see what felt caring, steady, mature, or brave in real life.
Nakakatulong ang specific appreciation para makita ng partner mo kung ano yung naging caring, steady, mature, o brave sa totoong buhay.
What is something we laughed about recently?

Ano yung something na napagtawanan natin recently?

Back of the card

Laughter is not a small thing. Sometimes it brings warmth back quickly when life feels full.
Hindi maliit na bagay ang tawa. Minsan mabilis nitong binabalik yung warmth kapag puno ang buhay.
What simple thing we do together makes you feel at home with me?

Anong simpleng ginagawa natin together ang nagpaparamdam sa'yo na at home ka sa akin?

Back of the card

Home is not always a place. Sometimes it is a rhythm, a tone, or a person who helps you feel settled.
Hindi laging lugar ang home. Minsan rhythm, tono, o tao siya na tumutulong sa'yo kumalma at maging settled.
Who do you enjoy eating with, even if the food is simple?

Sino yung masarap kasamang kumain kahit simple lang ang pagkain?

Back of the card

The company can change the meal. Some people make even ordinary food feel warmer.
Iba ang pagkain kapag okay ang kasama. May mga taong kahit simpleng meal, gumagaan yung moment.
For a good hangout, what matters most: tasty food, a comfy place, or good conversation?

Sa bonding, ano ang pinakamahalaga: masarap na pagkain, komportableng lugar, o masayang kuwentuhan?

Back of the card

Imagine a hangout with your top choice and nothing fancy. Where would it happen?
Isipin ang simpleng bonding na mayroon ng pinili mo. Saan ito mangyayari?

How to use them

Before you ask

A Filipino wedding reception usually has a printed program, a host with a microphone and a lot of time between numbers. Guests are seated by side and by family, which means you might spend three hours next to a groom’s cousin from Batangas and a coworker from Calgary. A question on the table saves the evening.

Keep the early questions playful: arriving early or on time is a loaded topic at an event that started late, and everyone has a group-photo move. Once dinner is served, the cousins’ table can get into the roles people play in a group and the most embarrassing reactions. Save the couples questions for when the newlyweds make their rounds of the tables, or write your answer in the guest book.

Since Filipino weddings bring together relatives from home and friends from abroad, every card has both English and Tagalog.

Good for

Reception tables of relatives and friends
Wedding guest books and message cards
The despedida de soltera before the wedding
Destination weddings in the Philippines

Tips

Put two or three cards on each table between dinner and the program.
If you’re a ninong or ninang, ask the couple one question from the last group at their table.
Don’t ask the couple when the baby is coming. Truly.
Bring small bills for the money dance, and a story for when the couple asks how you know them.

Decks for this

Filipino wedding traditions guests will see

Every family does it differently, but these are common:

Principal sponsors, the ninong and ninang of the wedding: respected elders who stand as witnesses and mentors to the couple.
Secondary sponsors for the candle, the veil and the cord (yugal), placed over the couple during the ceremony, and the coins (arras), thirteen coins given as a promise of providing for the home.
The money dance: guests pin bills to the couple’s clothes as they dance, a gift to start their life together.
Pamamanhikan, before the wedding: the groom’s family visits the bride’s family to ask for her hand and talk about the wedding.

Filipino wedding

Frequently asked questions

What are good conversation starters at a Filipino wedding?

Light, quick questions work best at the tables: arriving early or on time, your automatic group-photo move, the role you play in a group. For the newlyweds, ask about a moment they handled well together or a recent laugh.

What happens at a Filipino wedding?

Most include a Catholic or Christian ceremony with principal and secondary sponsors, the veil, cord, coin and candle rites, and a long reception with a program, dinner, speeches and often a money dance.

What does ninong and ninang mean at a wedding?

They are the wedding’s principal sponsors: respected people the couple chooses as witnesses and mentors for their marriage. It is an honor and a lifelong role.

Bring a better question to the table.

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