Questions · Meaningful questions
Meaningful questions about the people who shaped you
Ask anyone what has mattered most in their life and the answer is almost always a person. These questions go straight there: the teacher, the friend, the cook, the one who said the right thing once.
- 16 questions
- EN + TL on every card
- Free in the app
Kumustahan is a bilingual conversation card app: 1,200 questions in English and Filipino across 7 decks, with a short reflection on the back of every card.
What useful skill did someone patiently teach you?
Anong kasanayan ang matiyagang itinuro sa'yo ng isang tao?
Imagine you are teaching the skill now. What would you show a beginner first?
Isipin na ikaw naman ang nagtuturo nito. Ano ang una mong ipapakita sa baguhan?
The questions
16 meaningful questions to ask
Every question in English and Filipino/Tagalog, word for word from the Kumustahan decks. Open “Back of the card” for the reflection printed on the other side.
The people who taught you
3 questions
Skills, habits and the patient person behind them.
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What useful skill did someone patiently teach you?
Anong kasanayan ang matiyagang itinuro sa'yo ng isang tao?
Back of the card
Imagine you are teaching the skill now. What would you show a beginner first?
Isipin na ikaw naman ang nagtuturo nito. Ano ang una mong ipapakita sa baguhan?
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Who taught you a useful skill or habit you still use in daily life?
Sino yung nagturo sa'yo ng useful skill o habit na gamit mo pa rin sa daily life?
Back of the card
Practical lessons are easy to overlook, but they stay close. They show up in the small ways you move through a day.
Madaling ma-overlook ang practical lessons, pero dala-dala mo pala. Lumalabas sila sa maliliit mong galaw araw-araw.
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Who taught you a work or school habit you still use, and what was it?
Sino yung nagturo sa'yo ng work o school habit na gamit mo pa rin, at ano yun?
Back of the card
Some habits come from people who modeled them first. Their way of doing things can quietly become part of yours.
May habits na galing sa taong nauna lang magpakita. Tahimik mong nadadala yung style nila hanggang maging part na rin ng style mo.
Care you received
4 questions
Food, kindness and the times someone showed up.
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Tell us about a food that reminds you of someone taking care of you.
Ikuwento yung pagkain na nagpapaalala sa'yo ng alaga ng isang tao.
Back of the card
Food can carry care without needing big words. Sometimes the simple act of feeding someone well becomes a memory by itself.
Kayang magdala ng care ang pagkain kahit walang malaking salita. Minsan yung simpleng pag-alaga sa pagkain, nagiging memory na.
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What is a recent act of kindness that caught you by surprise?
Anong magandang ginawa sa'yo lately ang hindi mo inaasahan?
Back of the card
Keep names private if you like. Picture the instant you realized what they had done for you.
Puwedeng itago ang mga pangalan. Balikan ang sandaling naisip mo kung ano ang ginawa nila para sa'yo.
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Which small kindness from other people do you notice right away?
Anong small kindness mula sa ibang tao ang napapansin mo agad?
Back of the card
It could be someone checking in, saving you a seat, helping quietly, or remembering a small detail. The kindness you notice may be the kind you needed before.
Puwedeng may nag-check in, nagtira ng seat, tumulong quietly, o nakaalala ng small detail. Baka yung kindness na napapansin mo ang kind na kinailangan mo dati.
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Which compliment have you remembered long after someone said it?
Anong compliment ang tumatak sa'yo kahit matagal na itong sinabi?
Back of the card
The exact words are optional. Notice which part of the compliment stayed with you.
Hindi kailangan ang eksaktong salita. Balikan kung aling bahagi ng papuri ang tumatak sa'yo.
Where you belonged
6 questions
Friends and places that made room for you.
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Which ability did a friend notice in you before you noticed it yourself?
Anong galing mo ang unang napansin ng friend bago mo ito nakita sa sarili mo?
Back of the card
You could borrow their words to describe your ability once.
Puwede mong gamitin ang sinabi nila para ilarawan ang galing mo.
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Who knows what you like, and what do they usually get right for you?
Sino yung alam ang gusto mo, at ano yung madalas nilang natatama para sa'yo?
Back of the card
Being known can feel ordinary like that. Someone remembers your usual, your no-thanks, or the thing you always reach for.
Minsan ganun kasimple yung feeling na kilala ka. May nakakaalala ng usual mo, ayaw mo, o lagi mong pinipili.
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Tell us about a friend who made you feel like you belonged.
Ikuwento yung friend na nagparamdam sa'yo na belong ka.
Back of the card
Inclusion can happen through one seat saved, one question asked, or one person making room on purpose.
Minsan isang upuang tinabi, isang tanong, o isang taong sinadyang magtabi ng space ang nagpaparamdam na kasama ka.
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Who is a friend you can sit quietly with without it feeling awkward?
Sino yung friend na kaya mong samahan nang tahimik without it feeling awkward?
Back of the card
Comfortable quiet is its own kind of closeness. It means the friendship does not always need talking, joking, or trying hard.
May closeness din sa tahimik na hindi awkward. Ibig sabihin, hindi laging kailangang magsalita, magpatawa, o mag-effort nang todo.
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What helped you feel welcome in a new place?
Ano ang nakatulong para maramdaman mong welcome ka sa isang bagong lugar?
Back of the card
Would you do something similar for someone new? You can also leave it as a good memory.
Gagawin mo rin ba iyon para sa bagong dating? Puwede ring magandang alaala na lang muna ito.
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How did your first impression of a friend change once you got to know them?
Anong first impression mo sa isang friend ang nagbago nang makilala mo sila?
Back of the card
You can finish: “I thought they were..., then I noticed...”
Puwedeng ituloy: “Akala ko..., tapos napansin ko...”
What you’d like to pass on
3 questions
How you show care, and what you want to be known for.
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How do you usually show a friend that you care?
Paano mo usually pinapakita sa friend na may care ka?
Back of the card
Care has many shapes: checking in, feeding people, remembering details, giving space, or staying when it gets inconvenient.
Maraming itsura ang care: nangangamusta, nagpapakain, nakakaalala ng details, nagbibigay ng space, o nananatili kahit hassle.
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Who do you wish you could spend more normal, no-special-plan time with?
Sino yung gusto mong makasama nang mas madalas, kahit walang special na lakad?
Back of the card
Ordinary time can build closeness slowly. Not every good moment needs an occasion.
Nakakabuo rin ng closeness ang ordinaryong time. Hindi lahat ng magandang moment kailangan may special na lakad.
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Name something you want to be known for by people close to you.
Magsabi ng isang bagay na gusto mong maalala sa'yo ng mga taong close sa'yo.
Back of the card
The way you want to be known can reveal what you value. It can also guide one small choice today.
Yung gusto mong maalala nila sa'yo, may pinapakitang value. Puwede rin siyang gumabay sa isang maliit na choice today.
How to use them
Before you ask
A meaningful question lets someone thank a person who isn’t in the room. That’s the shape of most of these. They ask who taught you a habit you still use, which food reminds you of being cared for, which friend made you feel you belonged. The answers are stories about other people, and they say more about the teller than any question about themselves.
They fit the conversations that matter to you: a parent or grandparent whose stories you want to hear, a mentor on their last day, a friend you’ve known for years. They also suit a milestone birthday or a retirement dinner, when the room is full of the very people these questions are about.
Ask for the detail. “My mom” is an answer; the way she cut fruit for you after school is a story. Gently ask what exactly they did, and the meaningful part comes with it.
Good for
Tips
- Ask for one specific moment, not a general description.
- When someone names a person you don’t know, ask about them.
- If someone gets emotional, slow down instead of moving on.
- Tell the person they named, if you can. It’s the best follow-up there is.
- Write the answers down. They turn into family history.
Decks for this
Meaningful questions
Frequently asked questions
What are meaningful questions to ask?
Questions about the people who shaped someone: who taught them a skill they still use, a food that reminds them of being cared for, a friend who made them feel they belonged. They lead to stories that matter to the person telling them.
What are meaningful questions to ask your parents?
Ask who taught them their habits, which friends made them feel at home when they were young, and what they hope people remember about them. Ask for one specific moment each time.
How are meaningful questions different from deep questions?
Meaningful questions here look outward, at the people in someone’s life. Deep questions usually look inward, at fears, hopes and feelings. Both need time and attention.
Bring a better question to the table.
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