Questions · Filipino boyfriend
Questions to ask your Filipino boyfriend, and the family behind him
Dating a Filipino guy usually means dating a little of his family too: the mom who sends food home with you, the group chat of cousins, the Sunday he can’t miss. These questions get to know him, and the world he grew up in, without turning dinner into an interview.
- 16 questions
- EN + TL on every card
- Free in the app
Kumustahan is a bilingual conversation card app: 1,200 questions in English and Filipino across 7 decks, with a short reflection on the back of every card.
Who taught you a useful skill or habit you still use in daily life?
Sino yung nagturo sa'yo ng useful skill o habit na gamit mo pa rin sa daily life?
Practical lessons are easy to overlook, but they stay close. They show up in the small ways you move through a day.
Madaling ma-overlook ang practical lessons, pero dala-dala mo pala. Lumalabas sila sa maliliit mong galaw araw-araw.
The questions
16 questions to ask a Filipino boyfriend
Every question in English and Filipino/Tagalog, word for word from the Kumustahan decks. Open “Back of the card” for the reflection printed on the other side.
About the family he talks about
4 questions
Who runs the house, who taught him what, and the topic his family can’t stop discussing.
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At home, who usually notices the chores, mess, or little things first?
Sa bahay ninyo, sino yung madalas unang nakakapansin ng chores, kalat, o maliliit na kailangan gawin?
Back of the card
Every home has someone who notices first. That kind of attention can be quiet, but it keeps many things moving.
Sa bawat bahay, may taong unang nakakapansin. Tahimik minsan yung ganung attention, pero marami siyang napapaandar.
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Name a topic your family or friends can discuss forever.
Sabihin yung topic na kayang pag-usapan forever ng family o friends mo.
Back of the card
Every group has a topic that refuses to end. It keeps coming back because everyone has one more detail to add.
May topic talaga na ayaw matapos. Paulit-ulit bumabalik kasi laging may dagdag na kwento ang bawat isa.
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Who taught you a useful skill or habit you still use in daily life?
Sino yung nagturo sa'yo ng useful skill o habit na gamit mo pa rin sa daily life?
Back of the card
Practical lessons are easy to overlook, but they stay close. They show up in the small ways you move through a day.
Madaling ma-overlook ang practical lessons, pero dala-dala mo pala. Lumalabas sila sa maliliit mong galaw araw-araw.
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Think of someone who makes simple meals more fun. What do they do?
Isipin yung taong nagpapasaya kahit simpleng kain lang. Ano yung ginagawa niya?
Back of the card
A meal does not need to be fancy to feel full of life. Sometimes one person's energy changes the whole mood.
Hindi kailangang fancy ang kain para maging masaya. Minsan energy lang ng isang tao, nag-iiba na yung mood.
Food, obviously
2 questions
His comfort order is a window into his childhood.
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If you were too tired to think, what would you order?
Kapag pagod ka nang mag-isip, ano yung o-orderin mo?
Back of the card
The no-thinking order is its own kind of comfort. It is the choice that carries you when your brain is done.
May comfort din sa order na hindi mo na kailangang isipin. Siya yung choice kapag ubos na utak mo.
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Pick one snack you would still accept even when you're already full.
Pick one snack na tatanggapin mo pa rin kahit busog ka na.
Back of the card
Some cravings stay charmingly powerful. The snack you still make room for usually knows exactly how to find your soft spot.
May cravings talaga na malakas pa rin kahit busog. Yung snack na yan, alam kung saan ka mahina.
Just the two of you
7 questions
Couples questions for the quieter moments.
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What kind of greeting from me makes you feel most welcomed?
Anong klaseng bati mula sa akin ang pinaka-nagpaparamdam sa'yo na welcome ka?
Back of the card
The way you greet each other matters. Even a small hello can make coming back to each other feel warmer.
Mahalaga kung paano ninyo binabati ang isa't isa. Kahit simpleng hello, puwedeng gawing mas warm ang pagbalik ninyo sa isa't isa.
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What small thing I do on a normal day makes you feel chosen?
Anong maliit na ginagawa ko sa ordinary day ang nagpaparamdam sa'yo na pinipili kita?
Back of the card
Feeling chosen does not always come from big promises. Often, it comes from steady attention in ordinary moments.
Hindi laging big promises ang nagpaparamdam na pinipili ka. Madalas, galing ito sa steady na attention sa ordinary moments.
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When we are around other people, what makes you feel seen by me?
Kapag may ibang tao sa paligid, ano yung nagpaparamdam sa'yo na napapansin pa rin kita?
Back of the card
Being seen around others can feel deeply reassuring. It shows your connection still matters, even when people are watching.
Nakakapanatag kapag ramdam mong nakikita ka kahit may ibang tao. Pinapakita nito na mahalaga pa rin ang connection ninyo, kahit may nakakakita.
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What little thing do I do that makes ordinary days feel better?
Ano sa maliliit kong ginagawa ang nagpapagaan ng ordinary days natin?
Back of the card
Small care counts because it repeats. Naming it helps both of you notice the quiet ways love already shows up.
Mahalaga yung maliit na care kasi paulit-ulit siya. Kapag nasabi, mas napapansin ninyo kung paano lumalabas ang love sa ordinary days.
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What is one practical thing I do that makes life easier for you?
Ano yung practical na ginagawa ko na nagpapadali ng buhay mo?
Back of the card
Practical love is easy to overlook because it blends into the day. Naming it makes invisible effort visible.
Madaling hindi mapansin ang practical love kasi sumasama lang siya sa araw. Kapag nasabi, nakikita ang effort.
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What is one memory with me that still gives you a good feeling?
Ano yung memory natin na hanggang ngayon good feeling pa rin para sa'yo?
Back of the card
Good memories are not only for nostalgia. They remind you what kind of connection is worth repeating.
Hindi lang pang-nostalgia ang good memories. Pinapaalala nila kung anong klaseng connection ang worth ulitin.
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What future plan feels exciting and realistic for us right now?
Anong future plan ang exciting at realistic para sa atin ngayon?
Back of the card
Future talk does not have to feel pressuring. Hope can feel steadier when it has a real-life shape.
Hindi kailangang may pressure ang future talk. Mas steady ang hope kapag may real-life shape siya.
Who he is outside the family
3 questions
The habits and strengths his friends already know about.
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Confess one harmless habit you know is very you.
I-confess yung harmless habit na very you talaga.
Back of the card
Harmless habits become part of your signature. They may be small, but people who know you probably notice.
Yung harmless habits, nagiging signature mo rin. Maliit lang, pero napapansin yan ng mga nakakakilala sa'yo.
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Which ability did a friend notice in you before you noticed it yourself?
Anong galing mo ang unang napansin ng friend bago mo ito nakita sa sarili mo?
Back of the card
You could borrow their words to describe your ability once.
Puwede mong gamitin ang sinabi nila para ilarawan ang galing mo.
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How do you usually show a friend that you care?
Paano mo usually pinapakita sa friend na may care ka?
Back of the card
Care has many shapes: checking in, feeding people, remembering details, giving space, or staying when it gets inconvenient.
Maraming itsura ang care: nangangamusta, nagpapakain, nakakaalala ng details, nagbibigay ng space, o nananatili kahit hassle.
How to use them
Before you ask
The quickest way to understand a Filipino boyfriend is to ask about his family, because for a lot of Filipino men family is not background, it is the main storyline. Ask who in his house noticed the mess first, who taught him the one skill he’s proud of, and which person turns every meal into a party. You’ll learn as much about him as about them.
What usually goes wrong for partners who aren’t Filipino is guessing. The many titos and titas, the second and third helpings, the obligation to show up: it can feel like a lot. Asking is better than guessing, and most Filipino guys are happy to explain, especially over food.
Every card has an English and a Tagalog version. Try reading one in Tagalog to him. Even if you mangle it, it will probably be the highlight of his week.
Good for
Tips
- Ask about his mom, but don’t make it a competition. Respect for parents runs deep.
- Learn two words: “mahal” (love, and also “expensive”, which he will joke about) and “salamat” (thanks).
- If he invites you to a family party, say yes and ask him beforehand who’s who.
- Ask what he misses from home. Even guys born abroad usually have an answer.
- Balance family questions with questions about just the two of you.
Decks for this
Dating a Filipino guy
Frequently asked questions
What should I ask my Filipino boyfriend?
Ask about his family, the food he grew up with, who taught him the things he’s good at, and what makes him feel chosen by you. Family questions show you care about the world he comes from.
What should I know about dating a Filipino man?
Family usually matters a lot: expect gatherings, food and relatives with opinions. Respect for elders is important, and showing up for family events goes a long way. Every family is different, so ask him rather than assuming.
How do I say “I love you” to my Filipino boyfriend?
“Mahal kita” means “I love you” in Tagalog. “Mahal” on its own is a common term of endearment, like “love” or “babe.”
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