Questions · Father’s Day

Father’s Day questions for the dad who says he doesn’t need anything

Questions for Father’s Day at the grill, on the porch or on the phone: his famous rules, the skills he picked up along the way, and a few questions most dads never get asked.

  • 17 questions
  • EN + TL on every card
  • Free in the app

Kumustahan is a bilingual conversation card app: 1,200 questions in English and Filipino across 7 decks, with a short reflection on the back of every card.

Icebreakers№ 50

What useful skill did someone patiently teach you?

Anong kasanayan ang matiyagang itinuro sa'yo ng isang tao?

Tap to flipkumustahan
A note

Imagine you are teaching the skill now. What would you show a beginner first?

Isipin na ikaw naman ang nagtuturo nito. Ano ang una mong ipapakita sa baguhan?

Tap to returnkumustahan

The questions

17 questions to ask your dad on Father’s Day

Every question in English and Filipino/Tagalog, word for word from the Kumustahan decks. Open “Back of the card” for the reflection printed on the other side.

Dad’s rules

7 questions

The door check, the thermostat, the remote. Every dad has a system.

  1. Before leaving the house, what do you always check?

    Bago umalis ng bahay, ano yung lagi mong chine-check?

    Back of the card

    Small checks are tiny protection from future hassle. Everyone has one thing they refuse to leave up to memory.

    Maliit lang yung check, pero nakakaiwas sa future hassle. Lahat tayo may isang bagay na hindi pwedeng memory lang.

  2. Describe your ideal electric fan or aircon setting.

    I-describe yung ideal electric fan o aircon setting mo.

    Back of the card

    Temperature preferences can become a whole personality. Comfort has settings, and everyone defends theirs a little.

    Yung temperature preference, minsan personality na rin. May settings ang comfort, at may kanya-kanya tayong ipinaglalaban.

  3. Share one personal rule that only you seem to understand.

    Mag-share ng isang personal rule na ikaw lang yata ang nakakaintindi.

    Back of the card

    Personal rules can sound strange from the outside. From the inside, they usually have a very clear origin story.

    Minsan weird pakinggan ang personal rules sa iba. Pero sa'yo, usually may malinaw yang origin story.

  4. Name the small thing you always bring, even for a quick errand.

    Sabihin yung small thing na lagi mong dala kahit quick errand lang.

    Back of the card

    The thing you always bring has earned its place. It may be small, but it clearly passed the trust test.

    Yung lagi mong dala, may reason yan. Maliit lang siya, pero clearly pasado sa trust test.

  5. Name the household item that becomes an issue when it goes missing.

    Sabihin yung gamit sa bahay na nagiging issue kapag nawawala.

    Back of the card

    Some objects are only appreciated when they disappear. Their absence somehow turns the whole house into a search party.

    May gamit na napapansin lang kapag nawawala. Bigla na lang buong bahay, search party na.

  6. Confess one harmless habit you know is very you.

    I-confess yung harmless habit na very you talaga.

    Back of the card

    Harmless habits become part of your signature. They may be small, but people who know you probably notice.

    Yung harmless habits, nagiging signature mo rin. Maliit lang, pero napapansin yan ng mga nakakakilala sa'yo.

  7. Complete the line: I'm chill, but please don't ___.

    Kumpletuhin: Chill naman ako, pero please wag ___.

    Back of the card

    Tiny pet peeves are usually harmless, but they still deserve their moment. Everyone has a small line somewhere.

    Harmless lang ang tiny pet peeves, pero deserve din nila ng moment. Lahat tayo may small line somewhere.

How he learned it

5 questions

Skills, firsts and habits, and the people who passed them on.

  1. What useful skill did someone patiently teach you?

    Anong kasanayan ang matiyagang itinuro sa'yo ng isang tao?

    Back of the card

    Imagine you are teaching the skill now. What would you show a beginner first?

    Isipin na ikaw naman ang nagtuturo nito. Ano ang una mong ipapakita sa baguhan?

  2. Which small adulting skill are you proud you can do now?

    Anong small adulting skill ang proud kang kaya mo na ngayon?

    Back of the card

    Adulting skills can be funny and real at the same time. Paying, fixing, calling, cooking, asking: they all count.

    Nakakatawa pero real ang adulting skills. Magbayad, mag-ayos, tumawag, magluto, magtanong: counted lahat yan.

  3. Share the first time you did something on your own and felt more capable afterward.

    Ikuwento ang unang beses mong gumawa ng isang bagay mag-isa at naisip mong, "Kaya ko pala."

    Back of the card

    Finish if you like: "That was when I realized I could..."

    Kung gusto mo, ituloy: "Doon ko naisip na kaya ko palang..."

  4. When did you realize a habit you already had was helping you?

    Kailan mo na-realize na nakakatulong pala yung habit na meron ka na?

    Back of the card

    Helpful habits are not always dramatic. Sometimes you only notice them when life feels a little easier because they are there.

    Hindi laging dramatic ang helpful habits. Minsan mo lang sila napapansin kapag mas gumagaan ang life dahil nandiyan sila.

  5. When plans change, how do you decide what to keep, drop, or adjust?

    Kapag nagbago ang plans, paano mo dini-decide kung ano ang itutuloy, bibitawan, o ia-adjust?

    Back of the card

    Changed plans show priorities quickly. Sometimes the real answer is comfort, people, responsibility, peace, or simply energy.

    Kapag nagbago ang plans, mabilis lumabas ang priorities. Minsan comfort, tao, responsibility, peace, o energy lang talaga.

Questions he rarely gets asked

5 questions

For the drive home or the last beer on the porch, when it’s just the two of you.

  1. When pressure builds, what part of you feels like you have to handle everything alone?

    Kapag tumataas ang pressure, anong part mo ang feeling kailangan mong saluhin lahat mag-isa?

    Back of the card

    The proving part may have been trying to protect you. It can be thanked without letting it run the whole week.

    Baka sinusubukan ka lang protektahan ng part na yan. Puwede mo siyang pasalamatan nang hindi siya ang pinapahawak sa buong week.

  2. Where do you feel like you can finally breathe a little?

    Saan mo nararamdaman na parang nakakahinga ka na ulit?

    Back of the card

    The place does not have to be special to anyone else. If your body softens there, it counts.

    Hindi kailangang special sa ibang tao yung lugar. Kung doon ka lumuluwag, counted yun.

  3. Name something you are carrying this week that people may not notice.

    Magsabi ng isang bitbit mo this week na baka hindi napapansin ng iba.

    Back of the card

    Not every weight is visible. Being honest about what you carry can make the load feel less unnamed.

    Hindi lahat ng bigat nakikita. Kapag honest ka sa bitbit mo, kahit hindi agad gumaan, hindi na siya sobrang labo.

  4. On a free day, what activity do you enjoy even if nothing gets done?

    Sa free day, anong activity ang enjoy gawin kahit wala kang natatapos?

    Back of the card

    Not every good thing needs to be useful. Some activities are good because they give the day room to breathe.

    Hindi lahat ng magandang gawin kailangang useful. May mga bagay na okay dahil binibigyan lang nila ng luwag yung araw.

  5. What are you afraid might happen if you rest, delay something, or do less for a while?

    Ano ang kinakatakot mong mangyari kung magpahinga ka, may i-delay, o bawasan muna ang ginagawa mo?

    Back of the card

    The fear behind busyness is worth hearing. It may show what has been asking too much from you.

    Pakinggan din yung takot sa likod ng pagiging busy. Baka may pinapakita siyang sobrang dami nang hinihingi sa'yo.

How to use them

Before you ask

Dads often answer feelings questions with “I’m fine”, but they’ll talk for twenty minutes about the right way to load a dishwasher. Start there. Ask about his rules and habits, and you’re asking about him, in a language he’s comfortable with.

The middle questions get to how he became who he is: the skill someone patiently taught him, the first time he did something on his own, how he decides what to drop when plans change. These are the stories many kids never hear, because nobody asks.

Keep the last few for side-by-side moments, like a drive, the grill or a walk. Plenty of dads find it easier to talk when they’re not face to face. Ask what he carries that people don’t notice, then let the silence sit before you fill it.

Good for

  • Father’s Day cookouts
  • A drive or a round of golf with Dad
  • Long-distance calls on Father’s Day
  • Grandfathers, stepdads and father figures
  • Adult kids who want to know their dad better

Tips

  1. Start with something he can be funny about, then go one level deeper.
  2. Ask while doing something together. Side by side is easier than across a table for many dads.
  3. If he deflects with a joke, laugh, then ask the follow-up anyway.
  4. Don’t push. One real answer is a good Father’s Day.
  5. Ask about his own dad. It often opens the door to everything else.

Father’s Day

Frequently asked questions

What questions should I ask my dad on Father’s Day?

Start with his house rules and habits, then ask how he learned the skills he’s proud of, and finally a quieter question about what he carries or how he unwinds. Ask side by side rather than face to face.

How do I get my dad to open up?

Begin with practical, funny questions he enjoys answering, do something together while you talk, and leave pauses. Many dads open up after the conversation has already been easy for a while.

What’s a meaningful Father’s Day idea that isn’t a gift?

Spend an afternoon asking about his life and really listening. Write down one of his stories afterward; it becomes a gift you both keep.

Bring a better question to the table.

Free on iPhone and Android. 420 cards free, no account, works offline.